Barriers and my Life
by Elizabeth R. Wallace
We are all faced with barriers in our lives. A barrier to me is a protective mechanism to controlling behaviors that permit us to do things. A barrier can start as being a science, and a biologists understanding of a selectively permeable membrane as in a cell; or it could be anything as simple as a sifter that allows only the juice from an orange to enter the glass and not the pulp of the actual orange.
I would say that almost anything that we live by requires some sort of barrier. With the idea and examples of a couple types of barriers, my paper will instead focus on a barrier that I feel is very important to me daily, as I encounter different obstacles. Trust without a doubt is the ultimate barrier in my life and with lots of experience and adaption will continue to stand true.
The word trust is so broad that other barriers could also fall under its meaning. Trust can be based on past experience that adds to certainty of new experiences. It could also be a trait of believing in the honesty and reliability of others. Trust could be allowing myself to fall in love or to have my heart
broken; knowing whether I'm ill or not and if I should go to a doctor; or feeling comfortable enough to shake a person's hand that I have just met. All of these are barriers that assure us safety and limit us to make comfortable boundaries. Boundaries which in turn are also barriers because they are recognizable to us not to be crossed unless suggested otherwise.
Boundaries are a different type of barrier. Boundaries protect me while I'm in my house with the door locked to keep predators out. My boundaries are sitting in my favorite chair watching TV. It is allowing someone to enter the bubble I stand in to give me a hug. Again I trust that if I reach out for someone to help me, whether I know them or not they are going to help me if they can. If the person I'm asking for help from is someone I do know, I expect to receive help from them because I trust that they are reliable and won't let me down.
Love in my life is the biggest test for trust. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for five years and when we first met I was only 17 and he was 21. At that time in my life I had my guard up very high because I had so many goals to focus on and I didn't want to lose my focus especially on a guy.
I had previously had only two other boyfriends that had only lasted a couple of months. I had taught myself that I had more important things to do and I wouldn't really date until I was truly ready. Since he was older than me it was even harder for me to trust him (heck, I had no clue what his intentions were!) But after a few months of getting to really know him I knew that there was something special about him, and knew that I could let my guard down a little. Over the years we have experienced many confrontations because we are total opposites, and our opinions are not always on the same page. It was the trust that we had for one another, as well as allowing ourselves to be open to understand differences about each other that has kept our relationship alive. Our experiences have led us to be better individuals and have guided us to trust more to build a better relationship with one another.
Without a doubt we alone are the biggest protectors of all because we control the types of things that we want in our lives. We allow certain people to get to know us and be a part of us. We decide what kind of food we want to eat, the clothes we wear and the way our bodies look. We are the ones who decide to be prejudice or to love. Physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever it may be, we are the rulers of mankind. We also are a selectively permeable membrane, only allowing the things that we want, to be involved in the process of our never-ending greed for a perfect life.